I'll start with a story.
I remember when I worked at a call center and the many things I learned about the nature of man. I imagine being at an incoming call center is pretty close to what it might feel like to receive prayer. Of course I'm not saying God acts like call center agents... I'm just presenting an opportunity for empathy with the creator. Everyone that called my call center wanted something. They wanted their problem solved, and solved now regardless of expense. Sound familiar?
Here is where there is a divergence: a good call center agent solves the customer's problem in the shortest amount of time and with the least amount of actual effect on the company. The best solution was talking to them. Many customers were underinformed or lonely, both are easy to fix over the phone. The second best solution was to change something in the system. Sometimes this meant adjusting billing, or fiddling with the network. I did tech support so many of my solutions in this area were abstract. I told the system to clean up it's act, suddenly I have a happy customer.
Finally the final and least ideal solution was to get the customer someone who could help them better. Sometimes that meant transfers, but most often it meant sending a repairman to them. The company hated that, and rewarded agents for not using it.
How this leads in is that there are the same three categories for answers to prayer. There are the times you just need to talk to God, he listens and provides feedback. That fixes many emotional problems.
Second tier is fixing something in the system. For humans that means adjusting our personalities, how we react to things, or just giving us a sense of peace.
Finally sometimes God really swings for the fences. Ever seen God stop a crisis in progress? I have. I've seen it go from call the cops trouble to everybody going to bed with milk and cookies. I've seen direct intervention, and it is really something to see.
To the point I have noticed that he favors the first two in response to regular prayer. If I pray in the car, or in my bed, or when I wake up, he's got a huge chance of using one of the first two solutions.
Which isn't to say that is how my prayer is directed. Sometimes it is. But for 10 years I have been trying to get God to do a category 3 reaction to prayer that he gives category 1 and 2 responses.
I've already prayed a bit about this issue today, it's a regular topic for us.
I understand his will being his will. Which is why we agreed that I wouldn't attack the future on here. What this is is a philosophical response. How should I come to terms with the reality that these are the answers I am getting?
This is a new stage for me. I have said in the past that a God that does things that everyone else can isn't particularly impressive, glorious, or essential.
In a point:If cognative therapy and drugs can (and maybe did) create the "act of God", it won't cut it as testimony.
Category one solutions, the talk therapy? I'm doing it right now. It does not matter in fact at all if he pays attention to this particular discussion I'm having right now. I had a therapist tell me to journal to deal with my issues, and it works quite a bit.
Category two solutions, which is the sticking point, that covers stress management techniques. It also covers drugs. Here is the great thing about a good bit of cognative therapy and every drug I've ever taken: they don't ask for anything. If I sit back and take a deep breath an appreciate the things I like in life, that's just thought redirection. There is nothing spiritual at all in focusing on what makes me satisfied.
I broke down crying praying over the weekend, and the peace I have now is his response. I appreciate the peace.
What it really comes down to is that I want to know the problem is important to him. I want to believe I'm important to him. I guess what I'm saying is when he responds with peace when I ask for rescue, it hurts my pride. It makes it seem like.... I don't know... like I don't matter. Like he doesn't take my problem seriously.
I realized last night I have over 18,000 days left in my life. I'd like to have most of them be good. How involved can God be in that? Okay, Okay... that's a future question.
There are just times that trusting him that the solution he just handed me is incredibly hard. It's way harder to accept his answers than to ask him.... for me.
If he doesn't use direct action unless it's integral to his plan, or to pull my ass out of the fire.... I don't know what I can do to that. I've grown out of putting myself in trouble hoping he'll get the hint. I'm learning to accept that he's not going to let me in on the details of his plan.
Like I said, it's hard to understand how he can love me and at the same time have the reactions he does to my requests.
I remember when I worked at a call center and the many things I learned about the nature of man. I imagine being at an incoming call center is pretty close to what it might feel like to receive prayer. Of course I'm not saying God acts like call center agents... I'm just presenting an opportunity for empathy with the creator. Everyone that called my call center wanted something. They wanted their problem solved, and solved now regardless of expense. Sound familiar?
Here is where there is a divergence: a good call center agent solves the customer's problem in the shortest amount of time and with the least amount of actual effect on the company. The best solution was talking to them. Many customers were underinformed or lonely, both are easy to fix over the phone. The second best solution was to change something in the system. Sometimes this meant adjusting billing, or fiddling with the network. I did tech support so many of my solutions in this area were abstract. I told the system to clean up it's act, suddenly I have a happy customer.
Finally the final and least ideal solution was to get the customer someone who could help them better. Sometimes that meant transfers, but most often it meant sending a repairman to them. The company hated that, and rewarded agents for not using it.
How this leads in is that there are the same three categories for answers to prayer. There are the times you just need to talk to God, he listens and provides feedback. That fixes many emotional problems.
Second tier is fixing something in the system. For humans that means adjusting our personalities, how we react to things, or just giving us a sense of peace.
Finally sometimes God really swings for the fences. Ever seen God stop a crisis in progress? I have. I've seen it go from call the cops trouble to everybody going to bed with milk and cookies. I've seen direct intervention, and it is really something to see.
To the point I have noticed that he favors the first two in response to regular prayer. If I pray in the car, or in my bed, or when I wake up, he's got a huge chance of using one of the first two solutions.
Which isn't to say that is how my prayer is directed. Sometimes it is. But for 10 years I have been trying to get God to do a category 3 reaction to prayer that he gives category 1 and 2 responses.
I've already prayed a bit about this issue today, it's a regular topic for us.
I understand his will being his will. Which is why we agreed that I wouldn't attack the future on here. What this is is a philosophical response. How should I come to terms with the reality that these are the answers I am getting?
This is a new stage for me. I have said in the past that a God that does things that everyone else can isn't particularly impressive, glorious, or essential.
In a point:If cognative therapy and drugs can (and maybe did) create the "act of God", it won't cut it as testimony.
Category one solutions, the talk therapy? I'm doing it right now. It does not matter in fact at all if he pays attention to this particular discussion I'm having right now. I had a therapist tell me to journal to deal with my issues, and it works quite a bit.
Category two solutions, which is the sticking point, that covers stress management techniques. It also covers drugs. Here is the great thing about a good bit of cognative therapy and every drug I've ever taken: they don't ask for anything. If I sit back and take a deep breath an appreciate the things I like in life, that's just thought redirection. There is nothing spiritual at all in focusing on what makes me satisfied.
I broke down crying praying over the weekend, and the peace I have now is his response. I appreciate the peace.
What it really comes down to is that I want to know the problem is important to him. I want to believe I'm important to him. I guess what I'm saying is when he responds with peace when I ask for rescue, it hurts my pride. It makes it seem like.... I don't know... like I don't matter. Like he doesn't take my problem seriously.
I realized last night I have over 18,000 days left in my life. I'd like to have most of them be good. How involved can God be in that? Okay, Okay... that's a future question.
There are just times that trusting him that the solution he just handed me is incredibly hard. It's way harder to accept his answers than to ask him.... for me.
If he doesn't use direct action unless it's integral to his plan, or to pull my ass out of the fire.... I don't know what I can do to that. I've grown out of putting myself in trouble hoping he'll get the hint. I'm learning to accept that he's not going to let me in on the details of his plan.
Like I said, it's hard to understand how he can love me and at the same time have the reactions he does to my requests.
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