High standards

I wasn't always the ego filled sexist person who is currently writing about how many women aren't good enough for me. There was a time I would have been satisfied with anyone who wanted me. So, what happened?
Well, to be frank, I saw how someone else's faults could be my downfall, and I gained self confidence. You know how people say you can do anything you put your mind to? That's a dangerous thought, because if you really think about that you'll never settle for second best again(at least as long as your life doesn't depend on it, needs are much different from wants.) If you knew that with patience you could achieve perfection, would you settle for someone who demonstrated a good amount of instability? Well, if you are me, you won't.
So.... I realized there are things I'm not attracted to, a short list:
lack of intelligence
overweight women (especially to the extreme)
lack of compassion (big one)
lack of confidence (also a big biiig one)
being in any sort of situation that makes a meaningful relationship impossible
women who are in any way "Taken", I'm not helping anyone cheat

Thats pretty much it at the moment. After my marriage bit the dust I decided that I was willing now to date divorced women, women with children, non christians, and women who smoke or do light drugs. So I think that should balance it out. There is also a requirement of some spark. It's pretty rare. But, if when I meet a woman I know I'm going to break up with them because they aren't enough, it's unethical to get involved with them at all. I'm not going to marry someone who is obese... end of story. Unfortunately in our part of the country there are many many overweight women, and they appear to occupy a large portion of intelligent women. I've tried to open up and let some of the really extraordinary overweight women who have really impressed me into my life. It hasn't gone well. Hence the limitations. I just thought I'd say all that, since my roommate kinda poked at the issue today. She said "why don't you date so and so, she's interested", and so I had to explain this again... and it's not the first time I've said this. I wish it was different. I wish overweight women were sexy..... if they lit my fire like a slim girl.... it would be fantastic. You need to understand that I prefer a skinny girl with A cups (of course very pretty and feminine) to a slightly overweight woman with double Ds. Because... it's just what's hot to me. Sadly... this is america. Skinny intelligent girls are exceptionally rare, at least on the single scene. And getting their attention is a job in itself. So there you go, I have high standards, and I haven't met anyone who interests me who can follow through on promises. There is no woman I can trust in the dating world. Oh well.

why are all villains so high class?

I don't know if this bothers anyone else, but have you noticed that in most children's movies the villains are cunning, classy and well educated(not to mention well dressed and having the best musical numbers), while the heroes are working class, uneducated,  and generally have nothing going for them other than a surprising good luck streak, charm, and good looks.
It's a pet peeve of mine that I wanted to use as an intro to this shocking revelation: Owls are cool.
I was watching Rockadoodle, and got addicted to the songs the owls (who are the villains) sing. Then I started thinking "Are owls cool?" So I found a website about owls, and, yes, they are. Is your mind blown?

So, Owl fun fact:
A group of Owls is called a parliament
Like in England. How cool is that?
Many species will bob and weave their head, as if curious about something - this is in fact to further improve their three-dimensional concept of what they are viewing.
Just cool, no ifs ands or buts about it.
Eagle owls can eat other birds the size of a duck. How cool would that be to see? the duck is unsuspecting of attack when suddenly it's consumed by an owl. Winner? Owl. Loser? Duck. Ducks are lame. Owls are cool.

No Batteries

found rock a doodle on netflix, had a "how high was I as a kid?" moment, then this clip, is just so awesome



Just something so simple, and perfect about the owl's wicked glee.
(on a side note, life is good)

into the fact that life has failed to generate a true purpose, or "why you shouldn't bother getting out of bed"

I'm going to be brutally frank, life has been completely and utterly disappointing, or more to the point human beings have shown to be of little help or in fact actual use to this individual. This is mostly because of their utter failure to provide the emotional support, or satisfactory career, or a society with any greater meaning other than the meaningless chase of fame and material wealth, or the ability to follow through on the most simple promises. Last night I had another person promise to do something, and, yet again, fail to even come up with a reason for not following through. My roommate didn't understand why, a week ago, when I lost contact I took it as a bad sign. This is because my roommate, being an attractive young lady, has not had the enlightening experience of being treated with utter indifference by the opposite sex. Being blown off for a date is usually not a one time thing, it's the beginning of a pattern, which will end with never hearing from the person again. They of course only do this AFTER ensnaring your emotions, because, again I have to make assumptions, it wouldn't be fun otherwise. Of course she can prove me wrong if she wants, but nothing she has said so far has happened, and I don't really know what to believe.

I'm feeling particularly pointless about life in general, and if I didn't want to have a smoke and maybe do something with my day I wouldn't get out of bed. One reason is my bed is a glorious happy place and the world outside my house is more close to a hellish disappointing shadow of what may have once been a functional society. Yet eventually I will venture out into it again... due to my house's inability to support itself.

While blogger is offline

So Blogger, master of all things blog is offline for the night, and just when I have something to say. Well they didn't count on a good old word processor and the knowledge that words are words no matter where they go. As with many of my blog posts this will be stream of thought, so the topics will jump as my mind does. You need to understand that the main purpose of writing like this is to handle things emotionally for me. Why, without an outlet for my many many emotions who knows what would happen? I'd be up to no good, I don't doubt it. So, I'll start with where I started this evening, when I was thinking about everything in my life that makes no sense at all for me.

The topic of the matter is “Love at first sight”, with a possible subheading of “What do you really want Max Malcolm?” Well, what does Max want? Most of my friends seem to feel like they know better than I do. One or two do actually know that (insert an affectionate wink). It's so hard for me to open up right now, my name on the blog, you never know who might be reading right? Of course right. Well I tried posting under a different name... but people who wanted to know seemed to find the place anyway. Now, as I think about those that know me, I realize my thoughts are unremarkable enough that if someone DOES decided to read my ramblings, they probably have a determination and caring for me that though I do not understand, is regardless something I must respect. So if you made it through that quagmire of nonsense you deserve to know my true feelings on the matter, that matter being Love. I thought love was only true in fairy tales meant for someone else but not for me. Love was out to get me, that's the way it seemed. Yet disappointment still haunts all my dreams. I've started to fall for a woman before you know, and almost always the results did not match up with my expectations. Sometimes I read letters from a dating guru, and the other day he put his finger on the pulse of what is wrong with most men (himself and myself included.) He said something to the effect that by the time the right girl comes around most men have gotten too beat up to be of any use. I feel that way sometimes. A girl just found a way to touch my heart in a way I always dreamed of, just with her words. I have not had any sort of date with her, just conversations, meaningful ones. Yet how can I fall for her? Because it's so easy when someone makes you feel alive. I keep waiting for her to contact me, and that little voice in my head keeps wondering if I'll ever hear from her. My heart longs for her. I desire no other woman, period. What's a guy to do? I don't know. I don't know.

Now the second issue, a short one: What makes me emotional? The only thing I'm allowed to cry over are a few ideas about certain deaths. One is the death of a wife or child. That can completely take me apart, depending on my current circumstances. Finally, the death of my dad, just the thought of him not being around anymore can turn me into a weeping mess. There are many things I wish I could cry about, but that is the only thing I can't help myself on. Lets leave it there for now.

migration

I am migrating here from Facebook, for many reasons which I already lectured Facebook about.
My name is Max Malcolm, I'm 23, currently still single, divorced. I still keep in contact with my parents, and lots of friends from all different places. There is a sincere hope I have that all my friends will migrate over here to Blogger so they can enjoy the many features of blogger, without the many flaws of Facebook.
Blogger Dashboard is my personal favorite, if we learned to use it properly it could serve like the homepage does on Facebook. It's going to take some work to turn this into home, but once it is I'm sure I'll ever wonder why I used anything else.
I'm a professional writer, I have another blog just for that.
Lets see.... that's it, for now, hope to see lots of messages from my friends as we regroup and grow in a new environment.

intro: for those who don't know me, or have forgotten they know me

I'm starting over from scratch because my previous blog had become a liability and no longer an asset. Not to worry, it's all archived for safekeeping, and maybe I'll repost some of the songs and stuff, but for now lets move on.
I'm a 23 year old divorced man, a writer and student by trade, I like to think I'm nice but sometimes I have to vent. Hence this blog. Aside from the obvious benefit of improving my mental health, it also helps to have regular typing practice. I really don't know where to start, other than I'm happy at the moment, and have productive things to do today. I'll blog more about things as they develop.