Friday, October 11, 2013

Why men are afraid of God, why they need him, and what can be done about that paradox

I'm in an interesting time in my faith. Of course I am reminded of an old curse "may you live in interesting times."

I am all in with God. I don't say this so that you would be impressed with me, because frankly I am so not involved in people pleasing right now. I say that so that when he delivers me and I share how he has overcome this situation you can see the steps that led to that point. Through many trials and tests he has brought me here.

But I want to talk about being a man and finding God. I have struggled with both my whole life. What being a man in America today means is never admitting you are not in control. True masculinity is supposed to be supported by an unbreakable confidence that you are going to succeed, that you can somehow do it yourself. This is how we are taught to win the girl, this is how we are taught to get rich, this is how we are told to gain power.

The problem is power itself. Even the richest man must come face to face with powers and authorities greater than him. The sad fact is that alone you probably won't always win. Eventually I think everyone comes to the point of realizing that in the scheme of trying to overcome huge obstacles we are still very small as humans. A man is after all at most only between one hundred and eight hundred pound of flesh in a world with thousand ton obstacles all around. Like ants we try to attack anything that opposes us. We win often enough that it is possible for us to feed our illusion of total power in our lives. But life has a way of reminding us from time to time how small and powerless we are.

Men hate things that remind them they don't have power. It's one of our big issues with mortality. Why do you think suicide is on the rise? People want power over at least one huge thing. We think if we can close up our account on our terms we can defeat death. This too is an illusion. We hold on so tight to our illusions that sometimes coming to terms with the truth can't happen. This is of course until outside forces intervene and internal forces converge on the problem and seek truth.

The very thing that is most often championed by followers of God is what scares men the most. God being bigger than us scares us deep down. Surely it can't be. Yes we must admit on some level that there are bigger things out there. But we think we can build something big enough to take on anything and anyone. We build governments, machines, and other organizations. If a prideful desire to prove ourselves is in this even that which we build must come up against the powerful forces of the world. The very thing that makes us strong is our passion and perseverance.

However that which makes us strong is something that our enemies have too. They too have humans. Humans are the most powerful machines on earth. A single human can destroy even the largest most well defended of our creations.

What is even more amazing is that there are spiritual forces at work designed by their nature to bring us to our knees. We can kick, scream and fight it with all our might. Then in one all encompassing enlightening moment we understand. We can see that yes, we are not masters of the universe.

If we can see in that moment the one truth that one being is greater and bigger than the universe there is a chance for salvation. We need saving. We need to be saved from ourselves. Our pain and our flaws would kill us if we didn't take him up on his comfort. If you can dream you can fall. In falling we can get back up and try again. In trying again we may come to understand that God loves us. God is rooting for us. I don't even know if I'm making sense.

Never give up. Never surrender.

Fight on against the odds. Anyone can fight when he's winning, but if you can fight when you take devastating losses you become something more. You become a champion by never giving up. If you don't fight you can't win. Anyone who gives up without fighting has already made a looter and given victory to his enemies. Take up the sword of truth and fight the lies the world throws at you. I know you are better than this. Go take the victory, it's already yours.

 Remember someone loves you, if you need my help so long as I breath I will give it to you. I draw a strength from one higher than me, and I will take up your side in the fight against the forces that try and rob you of your peace and your joy. Take comfort in the fact that those that speak fear are far more afraid than you are. They are the weak ones, not you. Courage is not about avoiding being afraid, it's about pushing on and winning regardless.

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