I'm so tired of this place.
Tonight I opted instead of going to the gym to go visit church. And God decided to reward me with a heart aching challenge. The challenge in the message tonight was to put down roots and become part of the local church. Which is a GREAT idea if you plan on living somewhere for the rest of your life. However, if you want out with every fiber of your being, if you feel that the place you are at is a test to harden you against life's challenges, why on earth would you want to put down roots and stay? I'd rather get shot at dawn tommorow than spend the rest of my life amongst these people. I mean, if God so wills it I will live alone, work out, maybe find a drug that doesn't ruin my wind (hey, you can ingest weed, there ARE options) and trudge it out. I can survive anything with God at my side. I mean he kept his chosen people alive in the desert for 40 years. But they didn't have to be there. I don't have to be in this place, Christ died for me meaning I don't have to live in hell. (Hey THERE is an upshot, maybe earth is supposed to be hellish so you want to die sooner and go home to be with God?)
God can take me out of this if he wants, the trick is getting him to want that. I don't see how serving people here will make him want to rescue me from this awful place. *sigh* how long lord do I have to lift up my prayer to you to get me out of here? How many days of pain and fear are enough? How long must I be around people I have nothing in common with, that I don't WANT anything in common with?
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/TMgclhlpwb0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
There's got to be something better than this for me.
Oh PRAISE God that he has anticipated my frustration and created a verse JUST for such a trial as this. I am going to copy this down and paste it to my wall:
"Is there a blessing for the czar rabbi?"
Rabbi: "A blessing for the czar, of course, may god bless and keep the czar.... Far away from US."
So when I ask God, is there an appropriate Blessing for Oklahoma, he says "Of course" and gives me the verse. David, a man after God's own heart prayed these words.
Tonight I opted instead of going to the gym to go visit church. And God decided to reward me with a heart aching challenge. The challenge in the message tonight was to put down roots and become part of the local church. Which is a GREAT idea if you plan on living somewhere for the rest of your life. However, if you want out with every fiber of your being, if you feel that the place you are at is a test to harden you against life's challenges, why on earth would you want to put down roots and stay? I'd rather get shot at dawn tommorow than spend the rest of my life amongst these people. I mean, if God so wills it I will live alone, work out, maybe find a drug that doesn't ruin my wind (hey, you can ingest weed, there ARE options) and trudge it out. I can survive anything with God at my side. I mean he kept his chosen people alive in the desert for 40 years. But they didn't have to be there. I don't have to be in this place, Christ died for me meaning I don't have to live in hell. (Hey THERE is an upshot, maybe earth is supposed to be hellish so you want to die sooner and go home to be with God?)
God can take me out of this if he wants, the trick is getting him to want that. I don't see how serving people here will make him want to rescue me from this awful place. *sigh* how long lord do I have to lift up my prayer to you to get me out of here? How many days of pain and fear are enough? How long must I be around people I have nothing in common with, that I don't WANT anything in common with?
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/TMgclhlpwb0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
There's got to be something better than this for me.
Oh PRAISE God that he has anticipated my frustration and created a verse JUST for such a trial as this. I am going to copy this down and paste it to my wall:
Psalm 140
The Message (MSG)
A David Psalm
140 1-5 God, get me out of here, away from this evil;
protect me from these vicious people.
All they do is think up new ways to be bad;
they spend their days plotting war games.
They practice the sharp rhetoric of hate and hurt,
speak venomous words that maim and kill.
God, keep me out of the clutch of these wicked ones,
protect me from these vicious people;
Stuffed with self-importance, they plot ways to trip me up,
determined to bring me down.
These crooks invent traps to catch me
and do their best to incriminate me.
protect me from these vicious people.
All they do is think up new ways to be bad;
they spend their days plotting war games.
They practice the sharp rhetoric of hate and hurt,
speak venomous words that maim and kill.
God, keep me out of the clutch of these wicked ones,
protect me from these vicious people;
Stuffed with self-importance, they plot ways to trip me up,
determined to bring me down.
These crooks invent traps to catch me
and do their best to incriminate me.
6-8 I prayed, “God, you’re my God!
Listen, God! Mercy!
God, my Lord, Strong Savior,
protect me when the fighting breaks out!
Don’t let the wicked have their way, God,
don’t give them an inch!”
Listen, God! Mercy!
God, my Lord, Strong Savior,
protect me when the fighting breaks out!
Don’t let the wicked have their way, God,
don’t give them an inch!”
9-11 These troublemakers all around me—
let them drown in their own verbal poison.
Let God pile hellfire on them,
let him bury them alive in crevasses!
These loudmouths—
don’t let them be taken seriously;
These savages—
let the Devil hunt them down!
let them drown in their own verbal poison.
Let God pile hellfire on them,
let him bury them alive in crevasses!
These loudmouths—
don’t let them be taken seriously;
These savages—
let the Devil hunt them down!
12-13 I know that you, God, are on the side of victims,
that you care for the rights of the poor.
And I know that the righteous personally thank you,
that good people are secure in your presence.
that you care for the rights of the poor.
And I know that the righteous personally thank you,
that good people are secure in your presence.
Rabbi: "A blessing for the czar, of course, may god bless and keep the czar.... Far away from US."
So when I ask God, is there an appropriate Blessing for Oklahoma, he says "Of course" and gives me the verse. David, a man after God's own heart prayed these words.
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